TEST TAKER'S RESPONSE.

When we browse technology news from the (Omit it) major media, we can always see some newly developed devices becoming available. (available newly developed devices). Whether we buy these products immediately has always been a topic of heated debate, drawing ever-increasing attention. Because of the allure of novelty, some impressionable people believe they should buy it right away. As tempting as such a claim might be, as far as finances, time, and risks are concerned, I strongly hold the perspective that it is better to wait until many have adopted it. Firstly, purchasing state-of-the-art products may cost a fortune. When a new technological device comes onto the market, the companies and merchants tend to set a high price to quickly cover the money spent on production. Besides, since the product is new, it usually has no other counterparts. Its unique function also supports its high price. For example, every time a new generation of the iPhone comes onto the market, its price is often quite high at first. However, as more and more people got (get) the new iPhone, Apple gradually lowered (lowers) its price. As a result, those who wait could spend less money to get the same iPhone. In other words, they saved (save) a lot of money and reduced (reduce) the pressure on their finances. Secondly, buying such a product may be time-consuming. Admittedly, people have an inherent curiosity and desire for new artifacts. It is this kind of desire that makes many people go after these newly created items, which leads to a huge demand for new products. However, manufacturers may decide to limit the number of these products so that they can use the concept of "limited edition" and set higher prices. Therefore, in order to get these products as soon as possible, people may have to line up at the store door, which can take hours or even a day! It is quite questionable if it is worth spending time just to get the newest products. Finally, even if a man has a lot of money and does not care about time, the risks hidden in a new device are things that he cannot ignore. A newly developed product may not undergo enough tests before it becomes available. Consequently, if some people buy it right away, they may put themselves in danger. For instance, there were many people purchasing an autonomous vehicle at the moment it hit the market. However, the irresponsible manufacturers didn't (did not) conduct enough experiments on the car. As a result, some of those who bought the car right away suffered accidents. Some even lost their lives. In contrast, those who decided to wait are safe and sound. In a nutshell, I maintain the standpoint that when facing (faced) (with) a new technological device, we should wait until many have used it. This is because this type of waiting can save us money, time, and protect us from risks.

RATER'S COMMENTS

This is a commendable response that shows a good understanding and interpretation of the topic given.

The structure is standard because you have developed an introduction, main body and conclusion. The organization of the essay is surely good. There is good linkage of paragraphs. The cohesion within the paragraphs is good, you linked the arguments well.

The use of language is good save for the few simple grammar errors. You should avoid using contractions in a formal essay because some have more than one meaning. Also mind the verb tenses. These are very simple grammar errors that should be easy to address.

The subject matter is commendable. You developed a good introduction that clearly states your stand. You supported your stand with relevant views. The development of the topic sentences is good. The explanations and examples are suiting too. The conclusion is well stated.

In all, you need to avoid simple grammar errors by carefully proofreading through the essay. The structure is standard and the subject matter is relevant.