TEST TAKER'S RESPONSE. 1

The first bar chart compare (compares) the number of marriage (married) and divorce (divorced) (people) in America over a period of 30 years, and (while) the second bar chart illustrates the marital conditions of USA citizens in the year 1970 and 2000.

It is clear that the data of marriages were (was) much higher than divorces over the period shown, though a decreasing tendency for both was reported. Also, married adults was (were) by far the highest proportion of the four status (statuses) in both given years. In 1970, 2.5 million people got married and the figure remained (the same) in the following 10 years, while the divorces (were) reported at 1 million at first but climbed to around 1.4 million in 1980. By contrast, 1990 witnessed a 0.2 million lower number of marriages when (while) the divorces experienced a 0.3 million decrease, with the former at 2.3 million and the latter at 1.1 million. After (In) the last ten year span, marriages recorded at (Omit it) 2 million, falling 0.5 million from 1970, whereas divorces reported the same data as 30 years ago, still at 1 million.

There was a towering record for married people among USA adults in 1970, at 70%, and almost 59% saw (Omit it) in 2000. Never married (people)saw a (an) (almost) similar figure in both years, with the former at 15% and the latter at 20%, accompanied with the report of widowed, roughly 6% in each year. The divorced was (were) negligible in 1970, but climatically escalating to 9% in 2000.

COMMENTS. The response is good but the grammar errors are still many. You need to mind the word forms. For example, when you say “ the number of marriage and divorce in America”, the idea is vague. It should be “the number of married and divorced people in America”. There are verb tense errors. You need to mind the subject before you conjugate the verb. For example, is the subject singular or plural? The conjugation of the verb for a singular subject is not the same for a plural subject. For example, in the clause “It is clear that the data of marriages were”, the verb “were” should relate to the subject “data” which is singular. In this case you should have written, “It is clear that the data of marriages was”. You also need to make a review of the use of conjunctions. The sentence structures would have been good but affected by the grammar errors in some parts. You also need to use some more vocabulary. The structure is good because you developed an introduction and main body. Your essay is well organized. There is a good transition between paragraphs though the cohesion within the paragraphs is affected by the errors in some parts. The subject matter is basically good. Your introduction hints on the data presented in the bar graphs. The description in the main body is relatively good. You made a good extraction of the data. You also made some good comparisons of the data though more can be made. In all, the structure is good however, the grammar errors are still quite many. You made a good description and comparison of the data though more comparison can be made.

TEST TAKER'S RESPONSE 2.